Ep. 64: Unexplained Infertility

Welcome back to the Woven Well podcast! 

We’re talking about unexplained infertility, and I’m a little passionate about it today… So many women/couples are told this is why they aren’t getting pregnant. But, what does that actually mean? Does it tell any information? Does it help couples move forward in any way? 

I think it may be the most debilitating thing to be told by a doctor, because it leaves you feeling stranded, and stripped of any tools to help you make informed decisions. What next steps can you take, when there’s no path forward? 

When the diagnosis is unknown, how can you know that any decision you make will help to address it, and lead to healing and potentially the birth of a child? 

It’s disempowering. Which then unintentionally leaves couples vulnerable to all sorts of “next steps” of things they may not want to do, but don’t know what they could or should do instead. 

Is this accurate? If you’ve been told you have unexplained infertility, did you feel like you had a clear path forward after that point? I know, I know - it’s a podcast. But I’d really love to hear your experience and what it’s been like. 

If you were told you had unexplained in fertility, and you did feel stranded and lost/directionless, vulnerable, even despairing - then this episode is especially for you. 

We’re going to talk about options for getting to the cause of your infertility. We’re going to throw out what we’ve been told about infertility itself, and the ways to assess it. We’re going to start fresh and leave you feeling hopeful: because there are ways to explain your infertility. Yes, even your infertility. And we’re going to walk through the basic process of how to do it. 

As the intro stated, I’m Caitlin, and I’m a Certified FertilityCare Practitioner. I have the privilege of working with women just like you, who are ready for answers as to what’s really going on with their fertility. No one should have to experience being overlooked and unheard. But if you have been, I would love to introduce you to an alternative option. 

Letting you know about the options you have available to you is one of the things that led me to go through the 13 month Education Program to become a Fertility Care Practitioner, and go through additional requirements to become Certified. This is why I prioritize continuing education to make sure I always have the best resources available to my clients. 

Because, women deserve individualized care and treatment. We are all unique individuals, made in the image of God. Each one of us was crafted with purpose and beauty, and while our bodies generally function in the same way, each of them have their own idiosyncrasies and differences. We believe those differences should be considered and honored, even when it comes to health and wellness, and trying to conceive. This shift alone drastically changes the type of care and treatment you receive. You are not a number, or a statistic, going down the conveyor belt of treatments done to every other person before you, as well. 

You are a human being - a child of God - on an incredibly difficult journey. You deserve to be listened to, to be valued, and to be treated with respect. 

I’m not sure this is ever more true than for a woman struggling to conceive a pregnancy. Yet, this remains one of the most challenging and isolating experiences in a woman’s fertility journey. 

I’ve worked with countless women who come to me feeling beaten down by the traditional system. 

This isn’t your fault. You’ve read the books and blogs, you’ve done all that was asked of you. You’ve done all the things. But maybe the things weren’t specifically what your body needed. 

I want to encourage you that the path you’ve been on is not your only option. Believe it or not, there are other approaches out there, that are just as or even more successful than the traditional path. And I’d love to introduce you to it, so that you can consider what’s best for you and your family. So that you can make truly informed decisions. 

Here are the basic steps: 

• learn to chart your fertility with the Creighton method

• Partner with a like minded, trusted doctor who cares about your individualized needs 

• Identify what’s causing your infertility  

It’s simple and effective, and each step is important. 

Let’s start with learning to chart your fertility with the Creighton method. Now, we have lots of episodes on Creighton, because we strongly believe in its capacity to reveal an incredible amount of valuable information. Creighton goes beyond the traditional form of natural family planning, because it doesn’t only reveal when you are fertile or infertile as a couple. It also reveals signs of health, or concern as it relates to your reproductive health. It gives insight into hormone levels, cervical mucus capacity, underlying conditions, and more. It empowers you with information about your own body and health. 

Your body is already giving you all of these signs as to what’s going on behind the scenes, but you can’t access any of that information until you learn how to see and understand those signs. And that’s what I’m here for - a guide to help you begin to learn how to see and value your body’s signs in a way that’s simple, accurate, and helpful in working toward your fertility goals. I’ve been teaching the Creighton method for over 5 years, and I can’t emphasize the effect understanding your own body can have on transforming your fertility journey. 

It transforms how you see yourself as a human, how you connect with your spouse, how you value and respect your own body, but especially for those walking through infertility, it puts critical information about your fertility in you hands, which you can use to work toward getting answers. You’re not completely reliant on the doctors to let you in on how your hormones are doing or whether or not you’re ovulating. And this is empowering! 

But I also don't want you to to think we’re talking about moving forward without doctors, ok? Doctors are incredibly valuable partners on this journey. But the right doctor makes an unbelievably huge difference. I’m just going to say it: not all doctors are the same. 

I would love to guide you to trusted doctors and medical providers who probably do things a little differently than what you’ve experienced before. We work closely with doctors who: 

• deeply value the way your body was designed to function 

• work to identify anything that’s hindering that functioning 

• restore your health so that you feel better and can pursue your fertility goals

This is why I refer to these doctors as restorative approach doctors. They’re not like traditional doctors. They’ll have similarities for sure - they’re both OBGYNs or fertility specialists, they’re both looking at labs and ultrasounds, but they begin at a very different starting point: You are a human being, made in the image of God, who deserves individualized care and respect. 

If your chart is showing signs of strong progesterone production, you don’t need to be taking progesterone. If we’re seeing healthy ovulation cycles, you don’t need medications to “induce ovulation” or “trigger” ovulation. 

We can know these starting points, because your chart - your very body - will be giving the doctors the place to start. It will be your body and your experience leading the way to answers. So many times, I’ve worked with couples who will tell me all these concerns they’ve had over the years that were dismissed by their fertility specialists. They had irregular cycles, unusual mid cycle bleeding, brown bleeding at the end of their period, large clots during their period, etc. The doctors we work with most definitely want to know these things, because they’re giving insight into the health of your cycle and the specific areas of concern. If you’ve noticed it and been concerned, it’s worth talking about. So treatment isn’t the same across the board - it’s unique to your body and your needs. 

I’m going to say something that may be a little controversial. I’m convinced there is always a cause to a couple’s infertility. That’s because infertility is not a diagnosis. It’s a symptom. 

Infertility can never be the why something is happening. It is, though, a very helpful symptom that there’s a “why” somewhere behind the scenes causing it to happen. 

When we understand this, it puts all the power back in your hands. Not power to instantly conceive a child. But power to understand your body, advocate for your needs, and get to the answers. 

Being told you have infertility - and especially unexplained infertility - feels like a hopeless situation. By the name alone, it suggests that there’s no way to  move forward. Everything is a guess in the dark from here on out. 
But when you know that infertility is a symptom, then - when combined with your body’s charting and a trusted, curious medical provider - you have the tools to point in the right direction of the cause. 

I could talk more about this, but we did so in Episode 37: Infertility 101. We also have a resource about it on our websites resources page, linked in the show notes. I strongly encourage listening to that episode, because it goes in to even more detail about what those “whys” could be behind the scenes, and how a restorative approach will treat those things differently. 

What I don’t want you to think is that your experience was a waste of time. Or that all you’ve done so far has been pointless in some way. It hasn’t been. God will never let those experiences be wasted. And even restorative health providers value the information gathered before you start working together. 

But I also want to encourage you, that seeing things differently - starting from a different starting place - assessing your overall health alongside specific lab result values - treating you as an individual with individual needs - caring for you with the respect and dignity you deserve - it’s possible you’ll come out the other side with more answers, a healthier body, and having had a more peaceful experience. 

If this sounds like something you’re interested in, I’d love to help you. The great news is that you can pursue this other path any time you feel ready. You could join our next Introductory Session and start learning Creighton in the next few weeks. I can get you connected with a doctor quickly. You can start moving forward. It doesn’t matter how far along you are in other approaches. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been told there’s no way to get answers. You have the power to start now. 

I never want women or couples to feel like they were left without options. Or that they spent tens of thousands of dollars on treatments that they didn’t feel good about, but were told were their only options! 

I’m not saying that this process is perfect, or a dream, or anything crazy like that. I’m saying that there are people out there who are willing to invest the time to help you get answers, and believe your body is worth healing and restoring. 

To me, that’s probably what all of this comes down to… Not every couple will have a child. God has a different calling for each couple as to what their family looks like. But I do believe - deep in my soul - that every woman deserves to be treated with the respect.

Your fertility matters. Your body matters. Your health matters - because you matter. God declared you worthy of respect and love and dignity, when you were made in God’s image. 

Reproductive medicine can be a field that sometimes loses sight of the individual beauty of each person. It can skip over the fact that each person deserves respect and dignity. 

I’m here to remind you that that’s not good enough. That you deserve to understand how your body functions. You deserve answers to your infertility. You deserve a team that treats you with respect. You deserve a medical team that wants to work to restore your health and wellbeing. 

If you think that too, then you’re in really good company. Welcome. I can’t wait to meet you and get started. Click the Intro Session link the in show notes. Email me personally at caitlin@wovenfertility.com Let’s do this! 

I’m so glad you’re here, friends. I hope this episode has been one of encouragement on this very difficult road. 

If you enjoy our show, I’d so appreciate it if you’d let others know by writing a review on whatever platform you listen to podcasts. It really means a lot and makes a huge difference. 

As always, thanks for listening as we continue to explore together what it means to be woven well.