Ep. 94: Your Body's Not Bad
Caitlin:
Welcome back to the Woven Well Podcast. Today is a doozy. Okay. We are talking about the fact that your body is not bad. Now I know immediately there are going to be two different categories of listeners. We've got those who think, oh yes, this is for me. I really need to hear this. And then there are going to be the others who think, okay, skip, I'm going to move on, because I don't think my body is bad. But I would love to invite everybody to listen to this one just to see, because it's my opinion that this starts to sneak into our lives without us even realizing it. So, very few of us have this distinct message in our minds that we repeat to ourselves of "our body is bad." But it's incredible how often this begins to sneak into our minds and hearts through a lot of different avenues.
Caitlin:
You could say that social media is a big culprit. So we are in a time where everything is filtered. There are so many filters that take away wrinkles or birthmarks, that make our breasts look bigger or our hips look larger. They totally change the shape and the look of our face. These filters are not screaming: Your body is good, right? What are they saying to us? What message begins to seep into our hearts? And of course, it's not just filters. Anytime we're looking on screens, on our phones, online, we start to believe that everyone else's body is better than ours. So again, the message is not your body is bad, but do we begin to believe that our bodies are bad when other bodies are good? I also think that the TV shows that we watch begin to affect this. I actually think that they have a huge influence on what we believe a woman is, what women do.
Caitlin:
You know, when we see women portrayed in the same way over and over and over again, same features, same behaviors, we begin to think that that's what women really are. And we begin to compare ourselves to that. Do I live up to that standard of womanhood or femininity? But I'm not going to say it's just screens. You know, that's an easy one because we live in a time that truly is dominated by screen time. But there are a lot of other ways that we can begin to believe this, even religious ways. So for those of you that grew up in a religious or Christian, Catholic, et cetera, home, then you may have had experiences that led you to think maybe the church doesn't view my body as a good thing. The church does, by the way. We'll talk about that. But it doesn't always come out in that way.
Caitlin:
I think about a lot of well meaning children and youth leaders, okay? They try really hard. But in their attempts to have positive youth group trips, for instance, there ended up being a lot of rules about what you can wear and in how much of your body is displayed. Now, that comes from a good place. They're trying to instill a sense of modesty, and they're trying to have good interactions between men and women, you know? But what we're missing there is the education of dignity and respect and how that leads us to modesty. And when that part isn't shared, then a lot of times it can turn into, the reason I need to hide my body is because it's bad in some way. It's shameful, it's dirty, and I need to keep it covered. Because it can cause sin, right? I mean, it, it gets really warped in our minds and in our hearts, even when it comes from a good place.
Caitlin:
I've also heard a lot of people use Paul's verses in the New Testament where he talks about the flesh versus the spirit and how all the times that he talks about the flesh, it seems to be a negative connotation. So of course our flesh is bad, our bodies are bad. It's only the spirit that's good. But that is a major misunderstanding. So even these things that are warping our perspective on our bodies can come from a religious place. And then of course, our culture. We don't really live in a time that is pro body. We may think that we do, but that's a whole other episode. Maybe. I think now we live in a time that sees our body as a hindrance. You know, if my body could do this, if my body wasn't this way, then I could . . . We think about all the ways that we feel restricted by the body that we have, instead of acknowledging that this is incredibly important piece of who we are as human beings.
Caitlin:
So in whatever way it may have seeped into your life, I think the first thing that we all need to do is just see it and acknowledge it. And are any of these places, places that we should be going for guidance on how good or bad our body is? Maybe the religious place we think, well, you know, maybe we should be able to trust our religious leaders. But I would even caution that in the sense that, is it the religious leaders that we go to as our source? Or do we go straight to God's word? We know it's not social media. We know it's not online streaming services. It's definitely not Netflix. You know, we're not going to go to our world, our culture, to tell us how important and essential our body is. We're going to go to God himself.
Caitlin:
And thankfully, truly praise God for this, God has provided an incredible framework for us to understand how important and valuable and good our bodies are. Let's look first at the fact that we were made in the image of God. So at creation itself, God lovingly chose to design male and female in God's very image. We can't understand the full scope of this gift and this meaning, but we can know that there is no shame or evil in the creation of our bodies. And I encourage you to look at Genesis 5:1-2: "When God created man, he made him in the likeness of God, male and female he created them and he blessed them and named them man when they were created." Even let's go back and understand a little bit about Paul and his term "flesh". So the term "flesh" was often used to represent things in opposition to God and God's way, not just the physical flesh of the human body.
Caitlin:
So I am not a biblical scholar. I'm not going to pretend to be one. But I do think it's worth noting that those verses that give us pause as to the goodness of the body are often not referring to our flesh and blood, but our capacity to choose what is not of God. So anything that encourages us to rely on ourselves instead of our God is considered of the flesh and then at its root is evil. It's not the flesh of our body, but the fleshliness of our spirit, so to speak. So think about Galatians 5:17: "For the desires of the flesh are against the spirit and the desires of the spirit are against the flesh. For these are opposed to each other to keep you from doing the things you want to do."
Caitlin:
So that verse is not talking about the physical body vs. the spirit or soul of the person. It's talking about the things of God as the spirit and the things not of God as the flesh. And that's a critical differentiation. But we don't always hear it, especially when it goes back to those well-meaning leaders who don't have that information. And it can really leave a wound there. And then in the ultimate act of demonstrating the goodness of the human body, Jesus himself took on flesh. So Jesus is both fully God and fully man, living and being without sin. Jesus would not take on flesh if it was evil. Instead his physicality that demonstrates for us the goodness of the body and the gift from God, that it is. We share an incredibly intimate connection with Jesus who shared aches after a long day of travel. You know, joy in a delicious meal eaten with friends and the loss of blood from his body.
Caitlin:
Jesus is truly Emmanuel God with us. And then finally, even our bodies will be resurrected. So the fact that we're promised resurrected, glorified bodies speaks to their importance into who we are as human beings. They're not these temporary distractions or dangerous sources of evil. They are a part of our very personhood. We're not stuck in these bodies. We are these bodies. There's an author, Chris West, who talks a lot about the theology of the body. And he brought up a point that I love and I've thought about so many times since, and it's perfect for this October episode. So what are common themes in horror stories? Ghosts and corpses, they're both terrifying and freakish. Why? They're totally unnatural. And they're both examples of the separation of the living person from the body. It can't be. We instinctively know that, which is why the concept of ghosts and corpses are so terrifying to us.
Caitlin:
It can be difficult when our body isn't what we want it to be. I'm not saying that there's not pain here. There is, but that's different than saying the body itself is bad. It could be that the pain stems from the fact that our expectations are unfair. So maybe we have been significantly influenced by social media or Netflix or Hulu or whatever TV shows that we're taking in. And maybe we need to go on a journey of embracing the beauty and worth of our bodies and learn that other bodies aren't any better than ours. It could be that we've internalized a lot of shame about our bodies and we need to go through a process of healing with a counselor and a trusted faith community. Or maybe our body has disappointed us in some deep and painful way. So in our context of fertility, that could mean infertility, pregnancy loss, stillbirth, or even a hyper-fertility. You know, those women who feel like they can't help but get pregnant. Each one of those is a very difficult and sometimes deeply painful journey to walk. But these are hard journeys worth taking because our understanding of the body makes an incredible difference.
Caitlin:
A right understanding of the body can be transformative and not just in a self-esteem sort of way. I'm not saying all of this because I want us to feel better about our bodies as women. Yes, that's a side effect. But the intention here is to understand the amazing love and intention and purpose with which we were designed by God. Our image of our body so easily gets warped. But it's so critical. It's so important to have right. Because it affects a lot of other things. It affects our understanding of ourselves. It affects our image of sex, understanding of what sex is, the purpose of it, what it should be.
Caitlin:
The image of the body affects our understanding in the image of God. We as image bearers of God, our thoughts about our body are going to directly influence what we understand about God. It's just incredibly impactful to our experience as human beings. So I want to continue to explore the ramifications of this, and I'm already doing a little bit of that over on my substack page. I don't think I've mentioned it here before, but I am publishing writing articles several times a week on the writing platform called substack. So you're welcome to go subscribe for free over there, read some of the thoughts and reflections coming from this faithful take on issues of fertility and womanhood and more. But maybe the best tool to help us reconnect and reclaim these beautiful bodies made in the image of God is to invite God back into the conversation.
Caitlin:
So if God was the one who created these bodies, then God is who we should go to for the answers as to what they mean, why they matter, and how we can love them well. And I think a great first step in doing that is to begin to pray about and over our bodies. And I know this is really foreign. You may never have done this before, and that's why we created a free prayer guide on the website that helps you do this. It's a basic guide that introduces you to it. So in that guide, I encourage you to pray over different parts of your body, pray during different times of your menstrual cycle. And these aren't things you necessarily think to do all the time, okay? But prayer can be a fantastic way to open our eyes, to see our bodies in a new way and open our hearts to experience God's love for us in a transformative way.
Caitlin:
And really to begin to rethink what it means to be human by opening that journey up wide to God who is going to transform in love and truth. So I'll make sure to have a link to that prayer guide in the show notes for you. It's my joy to share with you about topics like this. I hope that you find them helpful. If you do and you want to continue hearing weekly Woven Well episodes, also check out our support the show button at the bottom of the show notes. It's a small way to help us keep going with this important message week after week. As always, thanks for listening as we continue to explore together what it means to be woven well.