Ep. 89: Honoring Learning Differences in NFP, with Elizabeth Kauffeld, FCE, CFCP
Caitlin:
Welcome to the Woven Well podcast. I'm your host, Caitlin Estes. I'm a certified fertility care practitioner with a master divinity degree. Each episode will cover a topic that helps educate and empower you and your fertility while honoring the deep connection your fertility has with your faith. Let's get started.
Caitlin:
Welcome back to the Woven Well Podcast. Our podcast talks about issues of fertility and fertility, intersection with faith. It's an outlet of woven natural fertility care, which is focused on empowering women to understand their fertility so that they can make truly informed decisions about their health, family planning, fertility treatments, you name it. While honoring the connection between fertility and faith, one main avenue through which we do this is teaching women the Creighton model system of fertility appreciation. Creighton uses one major reproductive biomarker, cervical mucus to pinpoint exactly when a woman is fertile or infertile, and also to spot possible hormonal imbalances, reproductive concerns and more. It's really a great system. I love it. But is it meant for everyone? That's a question that I get a lot. What about women with continuous mucus? Yep, it's for them. What about women trying to conceive a pregnancy? Absolutely.
Caitlin:
What about single women with irregular cycles? For sure. Postpartum ladies? Yep. Them too. What about women with learning differences or preferences? I want the answer to that question to be a resounding yes as well, and I'm not alone in that. Today's guest is an experienced practitioner and educator of the Creighton model system who is focused on how this method can work well for women with learning differences or preferences. In fact, I got to hear her share this summer about how we as practitioners can make this education more available to all learning types. So if you find that you learn best through alternative methods or maybe didn't always love the traditional school settings, then Elizabeth is here to share about how and why Creighton is still very much for you. Elizabeth has been a Creighton model fertility care practitioner for 20 years and a fertility care educator for 14 of those years. Elizabeth, welcome to the show. I'm thrilled that you're joining us today.
Elizabeth:
Thank you. I'm really happy to be here.
Caitlin:
Me too. Why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself and how you've been involved in Creighton over the years?
Elizabeth:
So as you said, I've been teaching for 20 years as a result of coming to this system as an engaged couple about 25, 26 years ago. I am married for 24 years and we have four children. And so between that and fertility care and a little other nursing on the side, I keep very busy, which is just the way I like it.
Caitlin:
Yes, I don't blame you for that at all. It sounds like a very fulfilling life. I've revealed already that you and I both believe that all women, including those with learning differences or preferences can use the Creighton system. So when did you first realize the need for support for this population?
Elizabeth:
I think it's just sort of developed naturally over the years. I think it's been a combination of my experience as a teacher with clients, different kinds of clients over the years that I've been teaching, intersected with the fact that I have some children in my house who also learned differently from everybody else. And so I've become more sensitive and more aware over the years, particularly seeing their differences and their need for some accommodations. I have to say that I don't have a background in education. So I have been a professional thief over the years and stolen a lot of ideas from the educators that have been so key in my children's lives, things that I couldn't imagine because they were not my experience with regards to learning and how they see the world. It's been really helpful to have coaching from professional educators and just seeing my children's feedback when they are in environments that allow them to learn even if they learn differently to see their success has been really rewarding. And so when I have been able to implement some of those things with my clients, I've also seen some really rewarding results.
Caitlin:
Yeah. Well, I love that you've been an educational thief. I think that's great, and I've heard before that imitation is the highest form of flattery. So if you've loved what those teachers have done and you are using it to make this a better experience for your clients and other women, I think that is fantastic and very appreciated. So I'd love to hear what some of those adjustments are that can be made to really make Creighton approachable to all.
Elizabeth:
I could talk about this for quite a long time. I think there are a lot of things, but when I was reflecting on this over the past couple of days leading up to this podcast, I was trying to sort of boil down to what I think the keys are. And one of them is time. I think that breaking information down into smaller pieces over a longer period of time is probably the number one most helpful thing that we can do. And so if you're a client learning the system, attending your appointments and asking your practitioner if you feel like you need an appointment again sooner, even if it's not what they're recommending at the time, just so you can review the material again, could be really helpful. I also know that our brains work when we convert short-term memory to long-term memory by needing to put that, that information to work before we can convert it to long-term memory.
Elizabeth:
And so we have to sometimes be creative in the ways that we engage our brains in a follow-up session when we're learning so that it's actually committed to long-term memory. And I think, I think that some of those are really basic things. Writing things down seems very basic, but it engages a different part of our brains and helps us to remember things. Taking notes in your follow-up, putting a sticky note inside your chart. Here at our center, we actually have a little leaflet that we will give to clients that has some basic information about their cycles and a place that they can write questions and things like that. Writing things down is very helpful if your practitioner is amenable to it. I think that recording can also be useful. I'm sure they'll think, oh no, that feels really awkward that you want to record me.
Elizabeth:
But really, if it's just a voice recording on some points that are just really hard for you to stick in your mind for whatever reason, that can be really helpful. You could play it back at another time when your brain is fresh circling back to the time. I think it's also key to keep in mind that time can stretch on for too long. Extra time to learn things can be really helpful, but there comes a time as we all know that our brains are on overload. There's nothing else that they can take in, and now we're just wasting our time. We are wasting our time and our practitioners and we might actually be regressing some because now we can't even remember what we talked about at that appointment. And so sometimes just saying, I'm at the end of what I can absorb today, could we make another appointment next week or in two weeks or whatever is a really great way to advocate for yourself. And I have to say from a teacher's point of view, I would find that really useful and helpful feedback.
Caitlin:
Absolutely. I was going to say, I would want to know that from someone. because we want our time together to be as effective as possible. So if you know you've reached your end for that day, better to just go ahead and say that and schedule another one in a week or two, than to try to keep pushing through and not get anything done. So I completely agree with you.
Elizabeth:
Absolutely. And if you know yourself and you know your brain is better in the morning and you can accommodate your schedule, your teacher teaches in the morning, ask for morning appointments. Personally, I don't schedule clients after seven o'clock at night because that puts me to about eight o'clock and after eight o'clock, nobody wants what's coming out of my brain. So knowing ourselves is half the battle. Just knowing that I absorb better in the morning or in the afternoon or in the evening trying to find a teacher that can accommodate that schedule could be really helpful as well. Kind of circling back to things that you can do as a client that are really helpful. You can ask to take a break. It's okay to say even just say, I'm, I need to use the restroom. Because sometimes just getting up, having a change of pace for a moment, you can sort of shake it off, reset your mind, and then go back for more. I think that can be really helpful. And lastly, as a new client, if you're learning the system, keep in mind that the learning curve at the beginning is steep, but it does get easier.
Caitlin:
Yes, it does.
Elizabeth:
Yeah, it really does feel like a lot at the beginning. But then, I'm sure you've had this experience too, Caitlin, that at about the six or eight months mark, clients have things so deeply ingrained in their minds and they make comments like, I can't believe I ever didn't know this. It's just second nature now.
Caitlin:
Absolutely. I completely agree. And I always try to encourage new clients that I promise this is the hardest part, but you will get there and you will look back on this time and say, oh man, it was so difficult then, but now I don't even think about it because it's so much a part of my daily life. Now as you were giving all those suggestions, which are phenomenal, I appreciate each and every one of those. You really spoke a lot to the relationship, the dynamic between the learner and the fertility care practitioner. And I do think that relationship is so critical. Not all fertility care practitioners may be trained in these methods, these tips that you just provided. So if we have a listener who would like to utilize some of these in learning, what tips do you have for them to advocate for themselves in that?
Elizabeth:
I think that's a really important thing to consider. If you recognize in yourself that you are not absorbing the material that's being presented or you need a little more time with certain concepts and things like that, that self-advocacy is really important, being able to just speak up and say to your practitioner, Nope, I didn't get it. When they say, did you understand that? And they keep moving, stop them. They really want to be stopped. They want to make sure that, you know, you can also just tell them right at the beginning if you have difficulties learning or you feel like your learning style is a certain way or it's different than what you think the majority of people are used to or you didn't love lecture styles in school where there was a lot of information poured onto you at once. And it can feel like that a little bit at the beginning of learning Creighton.
Elizabeth:
And so just telling your practitioner that these are the sorts of things you prefer. Do you mind if I take notes? Would you mind if I took a break or made a voice recording or we broke up some of this material feedback is really important and I, I would guarantee that all of your teachers out there want you to be successful. That's why they got into this work. We all have different experience levels with this, but they're probably willing to learn as well. And they're wanting to work with you, as you mentioned, that relational aspect of what we do is critical to what we do. And so we really want to see you be successful, so tell us what you need and we will try our best to make that happen.
Caitlin:
It is so important as a practitioner that I know what the needs are of my clients so I can meet them. Sometimes it's a part of my job to feel out what some of those needs are so that I can meet them. You know, sometimes I need to be the observer and the listener to kind of read between the lines to know what someone needs, and other times I'm not going to be able to do that. So when they tell me, when they share with me, you know what? I think I learned this better when you phrased it this way, or last time we met, we did this. And that was really helpful for me. I love that, that kind of feedback. And I want that openness in relationships so that they can feel comfortable to do that. And as you said, I really believe that the majority of practitioners out there feel that way. We care very deeply about our clients and we want the best for them. And so we want to make sure that they learn it and they feel comfortable with it and that they feel confident with it in the end. So are there certain things that a learner should look for in an NFP instructor of any kind? Maybe they don't use Creighton if they know that they have these learning preferences.
Elizabeth:
I'm not as familiar with other methods. Obviously I've devoted a lot of my life to Creighton, but I'm thinking anytime you learn something new, the more experience someone has, the better. However we all learn somewhere. And finding someone who just really clicks with you and seems to be in tune to your side of the relationship is probably more important than their experience because they're going to learn along with you what you need and they will take that information and carry it on with their future clients. So they're helping you and you're helping them in their teaching as they carry on. So finding a practitioner that you just really feel comfortable with and feel safe with, that you're able to communicate your needs, I think is probably the number one thing. If you have a friend that's told you, this person is great and I learn a little bit differently and these are the needs that I communicated to this person and they were very agreeable to it, then that's probably a good lead for you because you know that they have experience with those sorts of clients. But again, I really think the relationship is probably really key. And the more you can communicate once you're in that relationship, what it is you need, the better off we can meet those needs.
Caitlin:
And I know that for myself, I will always offer the opportunity to speak one-on-one before we actually start working together. So for any listener who's wondering about that, you can call several different practitioners, have a conversation with them, really get to know them. You know, like Elizabeth was saying, what is that dynamic there? Do you feel comfortable? Do you feel like this person cares about what you are saying and what you're requesting? Do you feel safe? And do they seem adaptable? Do they seem willing to do that? I, I think those are great tips there. Well, I thank you so much for being on today, for sharing so much about how to make Creighton accessible for everyone. I think it really is important and it's worth stating explicitly. And so I appreciate you sharing all of your tips and your guidance with us today.
Elizabeth:
I really appreciate you having me and obviously I love talking about this, so thank you for giving me the opportunity to do that.
Caitlin:
For sure, for sure. Listeners, I hope this has been as helpful and interesting to you as it has been to me. We at woven believe wholeheartedly that every woman, just like every human, is made in the image of God and deserving of respect. It's our desire to live that out in all that we do, including our Creighton services. If you'd like to learn more about what we do at Woven Natural Fertility Care, I invite you to sign up for our monthly newsletter at wovenfertility.com or through the link in the show notes. This is the best way to get up-to-date news about upcoming events, workshops, episodes, and more. And we'll likely throw in a discount code to our newsletter subscribers way more than anywhere else. So thank you so much for listening today as we continue to explore together what it means to be woven well.